Be a Better Person Than This

I rarely get into Facebook fights. I rarely get into fights at all. Partly because I’m a big-hearted overly emotional wimp, but also because it really messes me up for DAYS afterward. I would as soon someone go around and talk crap about me and think what they are going to think then to expend the mental, emotional and even physical energy to try and convince them otherwise.

Think I’m a horrible person? By all means, go right ahead and think that. Feel free.

However, when it comes to someone else being vilified or ostracized in a manner I find unacceptable – well damned if I cannot keep my mouth shut. I just can’t.

So I wake up this morning to see a post in my Facebook feed…

I just disagreed with the way some people in my neighborhood are handling a situation so they said I must not live here and kicked me out of the neighborhood groups.

And this came from a friend who I know is moderate, kind, generous and just about as laid-back as you can get. She had taken issue with some rather aggressive moves by those tired of prostitution on the Avenue. They have been photographing prostitutes, but now were also advocating sending those photos to the landlords of buildings the women resided in. In the middle of this anti-prostitution thread, she was attacked as being pro-crime and questioned as to whether or not she was even a resident of Historic Northeast (a requirement for being part of the Historic Northeast and Crime Watch pages).

And then, just as quickly, she was unceremoniously dumped and BLOCKED from both Facebook pages.

“Who cares? It’s a bunch of people being all snotty, who needs them” you might say.

And here is the problem. Both pages have thousands of members. And together, as a community, for the most part, we are working together to create change and improve the community. So it is a big deal. Events are posted there – neighborhood meetings are announced, crime is reported on the other page, important details such as photos of trucks and illegal dumpers. This helps the other residents keep an eye out, report suspicious behavior, build illegal dumping cases, draw connections between seemingly unrelated or isolated crimes, and more.

Being forbidden from accessing these pages just because someone takes issue with you disagreeing with them is not only rude, it is foolhardy. Stephanie is an asset, not a liability. She has posted about break-ins and suspicious people in the neighborhood, and that help her fellow neighbors and law enforcement to put together timelines, modus operandi and more.

So of course, seeing this, I had to get involved. Surely it was a case of misunderstanding, at worse, a sore ass.

I sent a PM through FB Messenger to the admin who had deleted her. We were connected on FB after I had stood in for him and interviewed with KSHB about saving Rambo’s restaurant (I STILL miss that place it had the BEST burgers and chicken).

I wrote:

If there was any confusion on whether or not Stephanie Adams is a resident here in Northeast, I would like to clear that up for you. Stephanie lives near the museum, on Norledge, and is a cleaning client of mine. I have learned she has been kicked off of Real Northeast and the crimewatch page as well. So, unless those two pages are NOT for Northeast residents, she should be reinstated on both.

His reply was as follows:

Someone sent me a message that they didn’t think she lived in HNE. She was kicked out of the group for being mean and nasty to me. I work too hard on these groups to be treated like that.

He then sent “proof” of her mean and nasty behavior…

And the following conversation between us ensued…

And in the meanwhile, in the couple of hours it had taken before he responded to my initial post, I ambled over to Real Northeast and the Crime page and posted this…

Responses varied, from “It’s my way or the highway?” to Heather Welch’s thoughtful post:

I can appreciate the frustration that disagreements cause in the heat of the moment. I’ve said and done some things I have later come to regret. But I hope hope hope that with time to cool down and sleep on it, a renewed perspective will prevail and admin will reconsider. Let’s just chalk this one up to our passion for bettering our community, shall we?

But seconds after Christian Stalder commented (and I don’t have it word for word) “Par for the course, by tomorrow this post will have been deleted.” – not only had the post been deleted, but I had been tossed off of Real Northeast and the Crime Watch page.

For daring to ask a question. For daring to question the status quo.

I’ve still got access. I just have to walk up to another computer and access it through another family member’s account on Facebook. So this whole thing is petty, stupid, and sad. It is a case of either a sore ass, snobbery/self-entitlement, the mulish refusal to see any other side but his own, or bullying behavior.

Be a better person than this, folks.

People WILL disagree with you. It is a fact of life. But if you close yourself off from anyone and everyone who does not believe as you believe, live as you would live, or support your every decision in a simple manner of a mindless sycophant – then YOU are the lesser for the experience.

Don’t we have enough extremism in our world already? Do we really need any more of it?

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